Here's to life!

Tonight's episode of OTH was so incredibly sad.. I haven't cried that much in a while! It's weird, but I actually like to cry. I like to be able to just let my emotions fall out and show on my face. What is the point of holding in your feelings from the people you are supposed to care about? Those are the people you are supposed to find comfort in, the people who care about, the people who want to help you.

It's times like these that make me appreciate what I have. It makes me want to never take anything for granted and to live life today, and to not wait for tomorrow because tomorrow could never come. It makes me want to run in a rainstorm with water up to my ankles, it makes me want to wander around a place i've never been, and not worry about where I'm going. Times like these make me want to drive the 14 hour drive just to see the person I love more than anything, even if it's only for 5 minutes. Because why wait? Why wait to do the things that are important, to see the people we care for? Why worry so much about building for a future that life doesn't guarantee we'll have?

It may sound harsh, but honestly, it's reality and I don't want to waste it. Every time I see something that reminds me of this, I try to promise myself that I'm done, that I'm going to start living for the moment.. but I always seem to let it slip.

So that's my goal.. to live every day like it's my last. for real this time.